Limelicker is not a role model.......

So, I've decided to come clean. I am a wonderful husband, child and brother to all who have to deal with me. But the slate is far from clean. I have screwed up a time or two. Time to admit my imperfections.

In 7th grade, I was in Mr. Cumberford's science class. The previous day's homework was to write a two page written paper about something related to science (the subject matter doesn't really affect the story and I don't remember it anyway). I totally forgot about the assignment that night.

The next day, upon entering Mr. Cumberford's science class, he immediately announces that there will be a pop quiz starting immediately. He also mentions that immediately after the quiz is completed by everyone, he will be collecting the two page assignment from everyone.

I'm in a big world of hurt at this point. Not only did I not write out the two page assignment, but now there's also a pop quiz to boot. As quickly as I can, I complete the quiz. I am the first in the class to finish the assignment. So now I have some time to try to get some of the assignment done. My goal is to at least get 1 page done. I know the subject matter, so it's just a matter of getting it on paper. If I get something down, I'll at least get some points for putting something down on paper.

I take out a folder to write on and some paper and begin writing on the folder under the table so Mr. Cumberford doesn't see what I'm doing. After a minute or two, Mr. Cumberford of course walks over to my area and notice me writing below the table. Mr. Cumberford always addressed everyone by their last name (i.e. Mr. Smith or Ms. Glass). He says to me with a smile/smirk, "Mr. Limelicker, what are you doing?".

At this point, I should have thought of a straight forward response such as 'I'm finishing up my paper' or 'Just some homework from another class'. But evidently my mouth caught my mind taking a nap. In frustration at being caught finishing an assignment that was due, I instead chose the words, "What the hell does it look like I'm doing?!?!?!".

Bad move.

The paper was snatched out out of my hands immediately. Mr. Cumberford told me in a stern voice to just head straight to the school office. He said I'd have to wait down there until he sent down the discipline papers. Off I went, quite dejected at my ability to say something stupid at such an inopportune time.

Normally, this would be a good enough story in itself. But my life is never simple. I got down to the office and the papers showed up about 30-40 minutes later. I was immediately asked to meet with Mr. Eddington, the vice principal. I went in to the office and we had a brief conversation just to verify the information about the situation.

Mr. Eddington then says he's going to have to call my mom. My mom at this time is an elected member of the school board. So imagine my delight when he calls her to discuss my behavior. Mr. Eddington knows my mom personally. So when my mother answers the phone, instead of immediately telling her about my behavior, he begins pleasant small talk with my mother saying things like 'how have you been?' and 'how's your husband doing?'. Meanwhile, I'm left to squirm in my seat knowing that the discussion will eventually turn to my brilliant blunder.

Long story short, he eventually addressed the situation with my mother, she was less than happy and allowed him to wield the punishment stick (i.e. I got two 8th hours cleaning up Mr. Cumberford's science lab). I had no defense for what I did, so I was just glad that my first run-in with a principal wasn't any worse.

By the way, Mr. Cumberford eventually rose to become principal of a high school in the same school district. He was a great teacher and quite a nice guy to boot. Last I saw him, he was doing quite well.